When you do not feel whole and complete you cannot see others for who they are. If you lack confidence and someone gives you a compliment it will fill you in some way and you will then perhaps subconsciously crave their words or words in General to make you feel whole in complete in that area. If you don’t love yourself and someone comes along who shows you acts of love or kindness you will only feel love for self if they are providing the tangible proof you are lovable. If you dot. Have self disapline, you are going to always need people to tell you want to do and when and seek permission outside of yourself
This is why the most important relationship you’ll ever have is the one with yourself. Become your best friend, your lover, your cheerleader, your authority, your everything

To be clear it is not wrong to want a relationship, a best friend, support from your circle, etc just be the first to give it so that you can clearly see people as they are, and not pedestal them when they are filling a lack.

Now let’s flip this. Another level to this is that when you do not feel while and complete within who you are you will over give to others what you lack.

If you lack confidence you may overextend praise toward others hoping to receive it in return.
If you lack self love you will love others too easily hoping to receive it in return.
When you lack self discipline you will always have action plans for friend in need or guidance for those around you hoping you will receive the same in return